Policenauts - The Greatest Story Ever Told?

hyperbole

[hahy-pur-buh-lee]

See more synonyms on Thesaurus.com

noun Rhetoric.

1. obvious and intentional exaggeration.
2. an extravagant statement or figure of speech not intended to be taken literally, such as “The Greatest Story Ever Told”.

Those of you now familiar with the Krishna style of reportage, will realise that the information that follows the title of each of my posts, rarely corresponds with the title itself. Today's subject is no different. Policenauts is of course, NOT the best story ever told... That honour goes of course to Ryo Hazuki's vengeful odyssey in Shenmue, but I digress...

And now to contradict myself outrageously within the first paragraph: Policenauts is indeed the greatest story ever told... The greatest story ever told... on the Saturn.

Now this is not a review... In order to review it, I would  have to comment on the story, assessing it's characters, setting, plot twists and outcomes. I simply cannot do all of that. If I did, it could possibly create a huge rift between myself and one of the other Junkyard correspondents, The Virtua Schlub - Mr. Brian Vines. The other day I posted a snippet of plot on the Saturn Junkyard Facebook page and Mr. Schlub chastised me for being a "huge spoiler dropping butt-munch", so don't be worried dear reader, I won't be dropping any "S-Bombs" during this epistle. 

Wipeout Playthrough in HD

With Wipeout fever being at an all time high here at the Junkyard - and with our Youtube channel sitting idly for a couple of weeks - I thought it timely to join our fellow enthusiasts of futuristic racing and show how beautifully this game in particular looks when running at a higher internal resolution.

I'm not the best Wipeout player in the world - far from it. In fact, the very first time I played it I positively hated it. I kept hitting the walls and slowing down, and couldn't figure out how to properly navigate the course.

Many years later, during my first time collaborating with the 'Yard, I gave it another shot, this time making the effort to understand the gameplay. It's actually pretty simple once you get to grips with it. You accelerate, you turn and, when trying to navigate a really tight corner, you use your air brakes for sharper turns. The trick is in understanding when - and for how long - to use the air brakes, since a split second too soon or too late will send you crashing against the nearest barrier.

It requires reflexes and finesse, and when you immerse yourself in it and pull off a good run it's incredibly satisfying. I was actually pleasantly surprised to see how quickly the old reflexes came back to me, almost a decade after playing it for the last time. Silverstream still kicked my ass, and I'm nowhere near beating the Rapier class, but I still managed to pull off a decent run.

And the graphics are reaaaaally sweet, minus some unavoidable glitches. We could really use an Omega Collection for the older titles. Too bad the series seems to be a Sony exclusive nowadays :(

Wipeout: The Greatest Racer On The Saturn?

Hello Saturn Junkys! First of all, let me apologise profusely to all of you rare creatures that find yourselves here, having a little read every now and then. This is supposed to be the Junkyard's main hub, the place we all come to find new and interesting opinions, stories and articles about our favourite console. Whilst original team member Nuno has been producing Junkyard YouTube videos which receive thousands of hits, he's also been writing articles on emulation and generally putting this old Father to shame... In fact, in May 2018, for the first month since the 'Yard reopened, I have contributed nothing to it's hallowed pages. As an excuse, I'll throw in a couple of those hiccups that life sometimes throws at you, one of the warmest, driest, sunniest Mays since records began, a birthday and some major yardening... but enough of the past, May has gone. Now we're in June; the mid-way point of the year. The sun is shining, the birds are singing and summer feels like it has arrived with a bang for the first  time in years! Time to shut those curtains, crack yourself open a cold one and get your Saturn on!

So by now I'm guessing the title of the blog piece has been a bit of a giveaway... today we're talking about Wipeout, a fast, futuristic racer with a penchant for jet powered hover-cars, majestic sweeping race tracks and an acid house/drum & bass fuelled soundtrack. This is a game which originally appeared on the PlayStation, produced by legendary publishers Psygnosis and indeed became something of  a flagship title for that console. So how did it end up on the Saturn? Did we get a decent port? And is it still worth playing now?